


The Naked Now

by lies_d



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, M/M, Oral Sex, Sex Pollen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-06
Updated: 2016-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-31 15:45:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6476305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lies_d/pseuds/lies_d
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Pied Piper crew accidentally get dosed with an experimental chemical that causes complete loss of inhibitions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Naked Now

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh ha, this is the spicy one folks.

"This party blows," Dinesh announced.

"I disagree. It sucks," said Gilfoyle.

"It does _neither_. You two just aren't elevated enough to appreciate it," Erlich informed them both.

Another night, another networking opportunity. Still, Richard kind of agreed with Dinesh and Gilfoyle. The food was weird, the band was famous but not very good, and everybody here made him feel like a failure.

At least Jared seemed happy. He was currently carrying Richard's drink for him, which alongside his own made it look like he was double-fisting. Richard took his drink back just so he wouldn't have to deal with how weird that looked.

Then the music cut out, confirming that the party was indeed lame.

A blond, bespectacled man was climbing up onto the stage. Richard squinted at him. Was that - _his doctor_?

"Excuse me! Excuse me everyone! Hey! This is important!" The doc said into the microphone he'd grabbed from the lead musician. "I just wanted to inform all of you that you may or may not have been exposed to a microdose of experimental chemical D-13. _Not_ because of my great new invention, the Vapotimer." He held up a disturbingly phallic device. "It's probably a completely coincidence, I accept no liability whatsoever. I'm just saying that if it _had_ gone off accidentally, then you'd definitely be exposed, and you should all go home immediately."

"Boo!" Somebody called out from the crowd.

"Aw, that guy brought a device prototype to a software coder's party? See how lame this is?" Said Dinesh.

"Yeah, that's pretty lame," Erlich had to agree.

The lead singer leaned over and asked the doctor a question.

"What does it do? Ahh, well. It causes lack of inhibition, basically. Extremely poor impulse control, and heightened emotions."

"So it's like being drunk?" Someone called out nearby, clearly halfway there already. "Wooo hoo! Way to get the party rolling!"

The crowd took up cheering and hooting and the lead singer took his microphone back.  The music started up again as security hustled the doctor away.

"I'm telling you, GO HOME! Pre-emptively apologize to your loved ones! And for the love of god shut all your phones and computers off!" The doctor shouted on his way out, followed by jeers and waves of laughter.

"Hey guys! Richard!" Monica made her way through the crowd towards them.

"He-ey Monica," Richard said. "Great to see you here. Um. I'd be great to stay and like, chat. But we were sort of just leaving?" He looked over pleadingly to Erlich.

"Yeah, we can go," said Erlich.

"I know, this party isn't great," Monica said. "I was just about to leave myself. That was before the announcement about the microdose of mysterious chemical X. Just thought I'd come and say hi."

So they said hello and then they said their goodnights and then they all headed back home.

~~~

"Is everyone feeling okay? Does anyone need water? It's important to stay hydrated." Jared told them after he'd shepherded them inside the house.

"That's for alcohol," Dinesh said. "This is different. Somehow. What was that stuff called? I think I'm getting a headache."

Jared started pouring them glasses of water anyways. Richard took his gratefully. He _was_ starting to feel a little light-headed, and water couldn't hurt.

"D-13. I'm looking it up on Erowid," Gilfoyle said. "There's only a handful of entries. All of them filed under 'Train Wrecks & Trip Disasters.' There's one called 'Worst mistake of my life.'"

"Wow, that... doesn't sound good," said Richard.

"Does it go with pot?" Erlich asked. "'Cuz I'm starting a bowl. In fact I'm getting out the good stuff - sorry guys, not sharing this time." He retreated to his room.

That seemed off to Richard. This wasn't any sort of special occasion, and Erlich loved to share his 'good stuff' if it meant he could boast about how good it was (from the few times that Richard had partaken, he really couldn't tell).

"It's like being drunk while being completely sober. I made a full night of terrible, terrible decisions," Gilfoyle read from his computer.

Richard shook his head. This was sounding worse and worse.

Jared wrapped a blanket around Richard's shoulders. Then he knelt in front of Richard, took off Richard's shoes, and started rubbing his feet. That was... odd. But Jared had always seemed odd to Richard, so he went along with this new oddness. Besides, it felt kind of nice.

"So what do we do? There's not much we can do to... stop ourselves from making bad decisions," Richard commented.  

"I suppose we could tie ourselves up," said Jared. "But no, then how would we go to the bathroom if we needed to?"

"Here's an entry titled. 'I fucked every single object in my house.'" Gilfoyle continued.

"Oh god, please don't read that one. I think we've got the point," said Richard.

"If we were all tied up and left one person untied, they could let us out if we needed to use the washroom," Jared continued. "But that wouldn't be fair, to leave one person untied."

"Maybe we should just go to bed and try to sleep it off?" Richard suggested.

"No no, hear me out," said Jared. "If we all tied each other up in a circle-"

"Nobody's going to tie anybody up," said Richard. "That's just... not going to happen. Sorry," he added at Jared's crestfallen look.

"Well, I suppose we don't have enough rope in the house anyways. We'd have to start using neckties," Jared chuckled. "And shoelaces. Maybe extension cords..."

Dinesh was pacing by the door. "You know what guys, my headache is going away, and actually, I feel fine. I'm going out."

"Not a good idea," Gilfoyle said.

"Power cables. Belts. Ooh, leather belts..."

"So what do we do? It's like, 9pm, I'm not going to sleep. And if I have to spend one more night jacking off, flipping through Tinder and crying, I'm going to fucking lose it. This is nonsense. I'm going out to get _laid_.” Dinesh pulled his jacket back on.

"Slow down, Romeo," said Gilfoyle.

"No, you slow down!" Countered Dinesh nonsensically. "Look at this, _look..._ " He started undoing his pants. Gilfoyle jumped up and just narrowly stopped Dinesh from showing them all his tackle. "This is some fine, grade-A man-meat. I'm telling you, I am a catch. There's got to be some girl - some woman out there. Who will appreciate me." His voice hitched, and for a second Richard thought he might start crying. "And I'm going to find her, because she is _waiting_ for me!" 

Dinesh tore out into the night.

"Oh, this can't be good," Gilfoyle said, and rushed to follow him.

"Richard - _Richard_." Jared squeezed Richard's knee to get his attention. "I've got it. If we tore up all the towels and sheets into strips, I think we can manage. I know some really great knots we could use."

Richard's mouth opened but he really didn't know what to say to that.

"I think I'll go with Dinesh," Richard finally decided. "I really, you know. I haven't been laid in a really long time. Sounds nice. It really does. I think I just _want_ -" The word lit up light a neon sign in his mind "I want to have sex. With someone. Anyone."

"I'll have sex with you," said Jared.

Richard took a few seconds to think about that.

"Okay. Sure." He finally replied, though he couldn't rationally explain why he'd made the call. He'd never thought of Jared as being particularly attractive. He'd never really thought of Jared that way at all. But now that he had an offer on hand, he discovered that he didn't think Jared was _unattractive_ either.

"Great!" Jared beamed up at him. He took Richard's glass of water and set it aside on the floor, then took both of Richard's hands in his own. "Maybe we should go your bedroom."

"Sure." Richard said again, because the thought of somebody walking in on them here wasn't particularly appealing. He let Jared lead him down the hall to his room.

~~~

"I'm so excited," Jared said while he fumbled to remove the buttons of his shirt. He looked positively giddy. Richard closed the bedroom door and pulled off his hoodie and t-shirt.

"I want to make this good for you, Richard. You're so wonderful, and you work so hard. You deserve this. We can do whatever you want, okay? You can do whatever you want to me," Jared said breathily.

Something clicked in Richard's mind. It felt like he'd been waiting his whole life for someone to say that to him.

Richard reached out and tore Jared's shirt the rest of the way open, sending buttons flying everywhere.

Jared's eyes went impossibly wide and a flush bloomed across his face. He dropped to his knees.

Jared undid Richard's pants, pulled out his erection, and promptly began to suck.

Richard bit his lip while Jared worked him. Taking a firm handful of Jared's hair, he pushed in further and started making shallow thrusts into the back of his throat.

Jared didn't gag or choke. His eyes were closed, his cheeks still flush. The look on his face was almost ecstatic. Richard wondered how long Jared had wanted this. He'd always been aware, in the back of his mind, of the hunger in Jared's attention, the fervour in his servitude. Why the hell hadn't he asked for this before? All those sad nights spent jerking off, when he could have been fucking Jared's face instead.

When Richard pulled out Jared looked bereft. He licked his lips and leaned forward, chasing Richard's cockhead with his mouth open.

"No - no. Take your clothes off and turn around," Richard ordered. Jared promptly obeyed, as he always did, as Richard knew he always would.

Richard retrieved a bottle of hand lotion from his desk. He shucked his pants and underwear.

Kneeling on all fours in the middle of his bedroom carpet, Jared was trembling with anticipation. Richard settled in behind him and laid a hand on his hip, as though comforting a nervous animal. Seeing Jared spread open for him made his dick leak in his hand. He lubed himself up with the lotion, and in the same beat conceived and discarded the idea of using a condom.

They had to shuffle a bit. Jared was so tall, they didn't quite line up. Jared spread his legs as far as he could. Richard put a pillow under his knees.

He put his cockhead to Jared's puckered entrance and pressed inside. Jared whimpered softly, so Richard went slow. He didn't want to hurt Jared. Jared was so _nice_ to him. Richard had always appreciated that.

"Fu-uck, that's good," Richard said under his breath once he was all the way inside. Jared was a tight, warm sheath around him. He'd worried that sex with a guy wouldn't be a good as sex with a girl, but this was already much better than the handful of sad fucks he'd had in his life.

" _Oh Richard_. You're so big," whimpered Jared, which almost made Richard want to laugh. It was such a porn star thing to say, and the idea of Jared being in a porn flick was perfectly ludicrous.

"Thanks," was Richard's reply. He didn't think he was _that_ big, but he'd never turn down a compliment on his penis size, and he didn't doubt that Jared meant it sincerely.

Richard pulled out a little and made some shallow, experimental thrusts.

"Do you like this? It doesn't hurt?" He asked Jared.

" _Richard_ ," Jared said, in a breathy way that Richard decided he liked a lot. "It's so good Richard. Keep going. It's _so_ good."

So Richard kept going, settling for a long, slow rhythm at first, enjoying the sight of his dick sliding in and out of Jared's hole. Once he felt Jared had had enough time to adjust, he pulled in closer and started fucking him in hard staccato thrusts.

Jared began making obscene little mewling noises, and Richard loved that. He loved the sound of their skin slapping together. He loved the way Jared pushed back into his thrusts.

Richard reached around to feel Jared's erection - hard and full and leaking. He'd never had sex with another man before. He'd never thought he'd want to. But it was satisfying somehow, to feel how much Jared was enjoying this. He leaned over so he could stroke him in time with his thrusts.

"Oh Richard, oh _Richard._ "

Jared trembled and bucked underneath him while Richard stroked him off. Normally so priggish and prim, Jared let out an undignified wail and made a mess all over the carpet beneath him. It was a pleasure to feel him come undone.

Richard was so close. Just a few more hard thrusts. He slapped Jared's ass and gave it a good squeeze, then pumped him full of hot jizz. 

Afterwards they lay panting, side by side on the carpeted floor. Jared took his hand, and Richard liked that. Seemed romantic somehow.

"I'm gonna want to go again in a few minutes. We'll need to pull down the mattress first," said Richard.

He was sure Jared didn't mind rutting on the floor like a couple of animals, but it might start to get hard on the knees.

Richard planned on having a long night, if Jared was willing, and for him of course Jared was willing. 

~~~

Richard woke up alone on his mattress in the middle of the room. It was late morning at least. He sat up. _Ouch_. He was sore all over. Not cool.

It took him a few moments to remember what he'd been doing last night that had put such a strain on his muscles.

_Wow. Really?_ He sat there for a few long minutes while the memories came back. He could scarcely believe it, but the evidence was all around him. Sticky sheets, lube everywhere, piles of used wet wipes. Clothes scattered by the door and yes, he was completely nude under the covers.

No Jared though.

Richard got up and pulled on some underwear and a housecoat. He found his phone - it was completely dead, so he took it out to find the charger.

There was coffee brewing in the kitchen, by the smell of it. Richard walked in to find Jared there, puttering around as usual, the first in the house to get up.

Richard stood and stared. He had no idea what to say.

"Good morning," Jared offered. His usual morning chipperness seemed tempered by something Richard couldn't name. Worry? A trace of fear?

"Morning," Richard finally replied. "How are you?"

A measure of relief crossed Jared's face.

"I'm fine, just fine. Good even. And you?" Jared asked.

Richard nodded. "I'm good. A little sore." He hadn't meant to say that last bit, it just kind of popped out.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I know of some liniment I could rub into your muscles -" Jared paused, his face colouring slightly. "Or, I mean, you could rub onto your muscles, that might help." He cleared his throat. "Would you like a half-caf?"

"Yeah. That'd be great."

Richard went into the kitchen, aware of every step that brought him closer to Jared. He seemed different somehow. Not his demeanor, per se. His body seemed different to Richard, even though it was exactly the same as it always was. Freshly showered by the look of it, his hair gently damp and neatly combed. Tall, lanky, awkward.

But now Richard had seen those long legs wrapped around his waist. Had seen them slung over his shoulders. He'd had his hands on that ribcage, that waist. He'd gripped those hips. He'd nibbled on that jaw, that neck. Kissed that clavicle, hiding under a fresh button-up.

He knew Jared's body differently now, and he felt strangely guilty about it, as though he'd stolen a secret he wasn't supposed to know.

Richard took the half-caf from Jared's hands.

"Thanks."

Jared watched him expectantly, as if waiting for him to say something else, and when Richard didn't, Jared looked down and put his hands in his pockets.

"Richard. We don't have to talk about what happened last night, if you don't want to. But first I just want to assure you that I had a full STD panel with my last check-up a month ago, and I'm completely clean - you don't have to worry about that."

"Okay, good." Richard nodded, embarrassed by his own recklessness in not considering that. "Mine was last year, but I haven't - um. I'm clean too. It's okay."

Then a frantic knocking at the door caught their attention.

"Richard?! Erlich? Is anybody home?" They heard Monica calling out.

Conscious of his unwashed state, Richard let Jared answer the door.

Monica stumbled in, wearing in a green cocktail dress and shoes that were probably worth more than his entire wardrobe combined.

"Monica! Don't you look lovely!" Jared said.

"Yeah, did you find a party or something?" Richard asked.

"No, I just felt like being pretty, and I couldn't stop myself," she said, with a wince and a shake of her head. "Last night was... something. I was really worried about you guys when none of you would answer your phones. Did you hear about what happened? It's all over the news. Fights, looting, orgies on the street. Half the people at that party ended up in jail."

She pulled a cigarette from her tiny, decorative purse and lit up.

"No, we didn't hear. Are you - oh god, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I mean, I'm okay," said Monica, ashing her cigarette on the floor. "I maxed out my credit cards shopping online, and I broke my best vibrator." She winced hard. "Sorry - I don't think that stuff has completely worn off."

"Hey - hey. No smoking in Casa Bachman unless it's weed." Erlich announced in a slurring voice as he walked unsteadily into the room. He looked...just awful. Richard was afraid to ask.

"Someone's gotta go bail out Dinesh. I just plugged in my phone and he left like, fifty messages."

"Oh... no. What did he do?" Richard got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"Indecent exposure, he said. He was crying, I don't know. God, last night I smoked every leaf of my best sativa - _I_ could cry. I'm gonna fucking sue someone."

"Oh, this is definitely a class-action case," said Monica as she lit another cigarette.

"And was Gilfoyle with Dinesh?" Jared asked. Richard wondered the same himself.

Erlich shrugged. "Didn't say. Don't think so."

Richard plugged his phone into the power cord still attached to his laptop. He dialled Gilfoyle.

"Hello," Gilfoyle answered.

"Gilfoyle, thank god. Are you okay?"

"Yep. More or less."

"Okay. Great. Where are you? Do you need a ride home?"

"Ah. I'm in Canada. Might take me a day or two to get back."

"You're in _Canada_?"

"Yeah. Last night I decided to fly home and punch my mom in the face. But then she punched me back and we had a talk about it. We're good now."

"O-kay. Good? We'll see you when you get back, I guess," said Richard. "He's fine," he announced to everyone else. "So. We all survived."

"Yeah, you guys seem okay," Monica commented to Richard and Jared.

"These two maniacs spent all night fucking like badgers. I could _hear_ them," Erlich complained to Monica.

"I know, I saw the vines. They were really hot." Monica winced again. " _Okay_ , I have to go now. I'll bail out Dinesh. Erlich, do you want to come with?"

"Yeah let's get out of here, in case these lovebirds are in the mood for another round."

They made a beeline for the door, leaving Richard and Jared on their own.

" _Vines?_ " Richard said under his breath. Then that came back to him too. " _Oh god._ "

He flipped through his phone. It was full to the brim of pictures and videos. He'd gotten a sudden aspiration to be an amateur pornographer, with Jared as his star.

"Wow. I. Um. God. That's, um," he turned the phone around, not quite sure of what he was seeing.

"That's actually quite good," commented Jared. "It's a very artistic angle."

"Thanks," said Richard. "I can erase it all if you want." The vine account had already been suspended, hopefully they hadn't been up for long.

"No. Please don't."

Richard turned his phone off to let it charge. He looked up at Jared, who was standing a little too close, as he was wont to do.  

Richard kept waiting for a wave of regret to come crashing down on him. He'd just spent the night having furious gay sex with a co-worker, which neither of them would've done if they hadn't been intoxicated. Shouldn't he feel ashamed?

But no, though he felt a little embarrassed about the vines. No regrets. Surprisingly.

He remembered the end of the night, when they were too tired to move. Sweaty limbs, curled up together. All the lovesick nonsense Jared had whispered into his hair.

It was flattering. Richard was sure nobody had ever felt that way about him before. He didn't mind. It was kind of nice. He did feel a little bad for Jared though, for falling in love so recklessly. It was like jumping across a chasm in the dark, without knowing how far the other side was, or if anyone would be there to catch his hand.

Richard's feelings for Jared were still a mostly blank page. At the top, a small dashed point  '-he's good in bed'. Followed by '-has great business development skills'. So where that left him, he really didn't know. He kind of wanted to go lie down with Jared again until he figured it out.

Maybe it was the last vestiges of that mysterious chemical flowing through his veins. Maybe it was his courage finally rearing its bashful head.

Richard took Jared's hand and leaned up to kiss his cheek.

"I had a really nice time last night," Richard said. "Would you maybe like to do that again sometime?"

Jared's face blossomed in a smile. He nodded. "I would love that."

"I could even tie you up next time."

Jared had no cogent response to that. He just blushed and shrugged and grinned from ear to ear, and Richard knew that whatever this was, it was going to be amazing.

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks to Joycecarolnotes and Daisiestdaisy for their kind encouragement!


End file.
